closure

a couple of years ago i became suddenly and unexpectedly sick. (of course unexpectedly. who expects to get suddenly sick?) i had severe pulmonary embolisms that knocked me unconscious, sent me to the hospital, and so on and so on.

(insert long boring medical drama here)

for a year my life was changed pretty radically. regular blood tests. countless doctor visits. a prescription that changed with the tide. and a lingering question of 'why?'

not in the philosophical sense.. but the physical sense, mainly. it changed my life. probably like most people who are told they 'should've died on X date', it made me really stop and consider if i was doing everything i could to take care of myself and better my odds against whatever mystery cause was underlying.

after a year though, i'd pretty much set aside my search for the cause and felt i was in better health than i'd ever been before. and in the year since then, i haven't given much thought at all to that incident other than a fleeting concern about what it may do to my insurance premiums, if i'm insurable at all, post-cobra.

that is, until a couple of weeks ago when mom mentioned that she heard about a class action lawsuit against a pharmaceutical company for a medicine i was taking at the time i got sick. for people with blood clots. particularly in the lungs and/or brain.

as it turns out, that was the cause, though i didn't know it or attribute it with any certainty until i read the case. so, i have closure. and maybe i'll be able to recoup some of my expenses. but i said to haley today, it changed my life for the better in so many ways; i feel as though i already received compensation.

*sigh*

d: more thorough drug testing before release.
b: i found the silver lining.
g: closure.