sleepy

there's a digital watch in my house, it belongs to one of the boys i think, that has an alarm set for 10:51 pm. it goes off every night and none of us know how to turn it off. well, of course i can make it stop beeping at the time it goes off, but as for disabling the alarm - that eludes me. i honestly believe that the only difference between the $10 digital watch and the $100 digital watch is the ease with which you can operate it. this being one of the former explains why the menu screens, if you can call them that, are written in hieroglyphics with abbreviations unrelated to the functions.

so, every night, whether in bed or on the couch, reading, writing or talking on the phone, the alarm goes off reminding me that a) i'm too lazy to apply myself to the task of decoding the technology and b) i'm too stubborn to simply throw it away. luckily it only beeps for about 30 seconds and then all is quiet.

for about half an hour and then another digital watch in the kitchen starts going off. i think this one is luke's. interestingly, neither of them ever have worn their watches; even when the alarms weren't sounding unpredictably. it's much simpler to let me just keep time, i suppose.

tonight i'm wondering about that though. it's nearing my bedtime, yet it's not. meaning, i'm exhausted and will be up early tomorrow; but yet it's not time for bed yet. and i find this so very frustrating. not because i want to go to bed, but rather because i don't.

i resent the fact that i need as much sleep as i do. and i probably don't need (or allow myself) as much as most people. for all the things that are waiting to be done and seen and experienced; i want to waste not a minute asleep.

but i'd compromise and sleep a few hours only. can i get that deal please? i'll be happy to take a short shift in the bunk and let someone else have it if i can just work out a way to discard the extra hours of sleep my body begs me for. (shush! it's not bedtime yet!)

having the whole day and the whole night would be a treat that i can hardly fathom. all the things i could get done and all the places i could go. that would be amazing. but, for now, i have to resign myself to the facts as i understand them. and that would mean i need sleep. more than a few hours.

i am consoled by my pillowmates though. as i look at sleeping mega and remember and anticipate haley's arms around me, i know i'm in for a night of sweet, sweet dreams. safely to begin after the second watch alarm sounds...

d: godspeed for haley... i'm fading fast.
b: starting tomorrow off with an early morning training session! my client survived the first and is back for more...
g: the watches go off at 10 something rather than 2 am.