fill

some people say the body is the greatest machine ever built. and in some ways, of course, that's true. intricate systems that work in tandem. complex mechanisms. efficient fuel utilization. capable of amazing strength, speed and maneuvering. when you think about it that way, our bodies sound like the biggest, baddest hot rods around.

but machines don't change or grow or adapt. maybe our bodies are more like plants, in that way. with the proper care and nutrition, they can climb walls, break through barriers and radiate beauty.

then of course, there are many who say the body is a temple. the carrier of our soul and where we house a part of god. or manifest god, depending on individual spiritual beliefs.

i agree in part with each of these metaphors.. and yet, today i am finding my body to be more of a puzzle. all the parts fit together in a perfect way, and yet, there's a mystery to it too. the edges are the easy part while the center fills in, ever so slowly. some sections apparent and others seemingly impossible.

today i woke feeling strong, healthy, rested; albeit a little sore in my calves. and then, mysteriously, after a balanced nutritious lunch, my body shut down. eyes couldn't stay open. mind couldn't focus. head started pounding. and all i could think about was coffee and chocolate to muddle through a four hour meeting without resting my head on the conference table.

after commuting for an hour and fifteen, i arrived at the gym. unsure what response my body would give, i opted for the ole 'fake it till you make it' strategy. an hour and a half later, i drove out of the parking lot with a satisfying muscle ache, gnawing hunger, and energy. energy!

my body is an enigma to me... i'm learning to trust it again. listen to its signs. and demand the results i want from it.

one of my favorite movies is the documentary 'what the bleep do we know'.. there's a scene in the movie that illustrates a research project by dr. masaru emoto called 'messages on water'. dr. emoto puts words on bottles of water, freezes them and then photographs the crystals. it sounds preposterous, but the water responds to the words in truly magical ways.

the movie then goes on to remind us that our bodies are close to 90% water (i think that's the number.. don't hold me to it), so if words can do that to water, what do they do to us?

and then i go to tattoos. after all, that's the closest application of the idea. i want to fill mine in. it took me years to decide on the edges. and now i want to fill it in, as i'm filling in. as the picture is forming, so also should my tattoo.

d: fill within my edges.
b: an intense work-out filled in a piece of the puzzle for me today.
g: large sections are becomng clear.. and beautiful.