manna-fest

i've met a number of people over the past few years that have found ways to balance their creative passions, their personal passions and their work; where those are not one and the same.

one friend who made a documentary film.
one friend who has a second career as an artistic portrait photographer.
one friend who is a writer and does literary blogging.
and of course i met haley, who has the art vs income-driven-work balance down to a science.

i thought to myself when i met these people things like, 'i wish i could do that..' or 'maybe i'll get a chance to do that in another life..' or 'too bad i don't have that freedom.' and it wasn't until a few months ago that i realized, in fact, i could do that. i could have that freedom. i could have that chance this time around, rather than wait until my next lifetime.

if i'd just stop telling myself i couldn't, that is.

so, in april, i consciously stopped telling myself those messages. i didn't exactly make a 180, but i did start believing i could have better when it came to work, at least. and then a couple of months later, i started consiously rewriting my belief that it even had to be 'work' in the typical sense of the word. i opened myself to something more spectacular, more unconventional, more right for me.

i didn't know what it would be, but i spent time laying out what it would look like. what freedoms i'd be afforded. what i'd do every day and what i'd let go of. this was different than my 'pefect job' list, which i've written about before, but it was more about my life in this new scenario. maybe work was involved, maybe not.

i think maybe i went 90 degrees on the first decision in april, to purposefully create a better work situation, and then another 90 degrees in june, when i decided to redesign my life. a life that would let me exercise every morning without robbing me of time with haley at night (ie, not at 5 am spin class.). a life that would let me pursue my creative interests with hours before 11pm to begin them (ie blogging and novel-writing.) a life that would help me accommodate the boys' growing transportation needs (ie. social and extracurricular activities). a life where the work i did do would be more suitable to my interests, talents and better compensated. a life where i could have a dog and plenty of time to spend with her and train her.

i set out last month with the intention of believing this into existence. manifesting it, if you will, through my creative mind. and friday, my creativity paid off.

everything clicked into place at work, with a job that will enable me to do some contract work for my current employer, in a different division. a fair pay rate. flexible hours and work location. the job is something i'm actually quite interested in, will be great for my resume, and may prove to be something more in the long run. combined with some other provisions i have lined up, i'm excited to say that i got exactly what i asked for. and then some.

i like the word manifest a lot. i think it's the way it sounds rather than the way it looks though, which is unusual for me. sometimes i even fall for a word based on they way it types or writes. but i digress.

i think the thing i like about it is that it sounds like manna-fest. and manna reminds me of something i learned in sunday school as a child.. miraculous nourishment from god dropped down from heaven. and fest - as in a party.

i know that after i manifested, or mannafested, the perfect work situation friday, i certainly felt like a party.

d: i have a new manifesting project underway.. hope the universe still loves speed.
b: i let go of 'can't, couldn't, and next time'.
g: i learned how to use this power.